Does My Partner Have Birth Trauma?
When we become parents, we expect our lives and relationships to change. But if your partner had a difficult birth, some of these changes can be distressing and may have you wondering whether your partner is experiencing birth trauma. Birth trauma can have a significant impact on a person's mental health and well-being. If your partner has experienced a traumatic birth, they may show the following signs:
Intrusive thoughts or flashbacks of the traumatic birth experience, this can include nightmares or simply revisiting the distressing memories
Avoidance behaviors, this can include avoiding hospitals, doctors, or any reminders of the traumatic birth, such as smells or sounds, It can also include avoidance of being alone, avoiding going out with the baby, avoiding taking time to relax in case the memories return.
Difficulty sleeping or frequent nightmares, we know it’s especially hard to sleep when you have a baby, but it can be even more difficult to allow the body to relax when you’re suffering from trauma.
Anxiety or panic attacks, the anxiety may be focused on the baby, but can also be directed at other things.
Depression or mood swings, we sometimes talk about the ‘baby blues’ but this should be a brief period of low mood, if it persists, find support.
Feeling detached or disconnected from the baby or difficulty bonding with the baby. This can be really difficult to see, but it’s a common response to trauma and it’s something that can be resolved with support.
Irritability, anger, or emotional numbness
Physical symptoms, such as headaches, nausea, or chronic pain
Hypervigilance or an exaggerated startle response
It's important to note that not everyone who has experienced a traumatic birth will show these signs, and that each person's experience will be unique. Some of these signs can also indicate postnatal depression or anxiety, which can occur independently of birth trauma.
If you believe your partner may be experiencing birth trauma or other mental health concerns, it's important to encourage them to seek professional help. A healthcare provider or mental health professional can help your partner process their experience and develop coping strategies to manage their symptoms. It's also important to offer support, empathy, and understanding as your partner navigates this difficult time.
Don’t forget to look after yourself too, if your partner experienced a traumatic birth, it’s likely that you also witnessed and felt those difficult things. Birth partners can suffer from birth trauma as well and it’s important to seek support if you’re feeling distressed.
You can read more about overcoming birth trauma here: