Seven ways to support yourself as a new parent
Congratulations on becoming a new parent! Being a parent is a wonderful and challenging experience, and there's no doubt that you have a lot on your plate right now. As a hypnobirthing instructor and a clinical hypnotherapist/psychotherapist working with parents on their mental health after birth, here are some tips and advice that I’d love to share with you to help you navigate this exciting new chapter in your life:
Take care of yourself: It's important to remember that taking care of yourself is just as important as taking care of your new baby. Make sure you are getting enough rest, eating meals, and taking time for yourself when you need it. You'll be better equipped to handle the challenges of parenthood if you're taking care of your own needs. This isn’t always easy and often requires support from family, friends or professionals (if you haven’t heard of a postnatal doula, look them up!).
Following on from number 1, don't be afraid to ask for help: Being a new parent can be overwhelming, and it's okay to ask for help. Whether it's from family, friends, or professionals, don't be afraid to reach out when you need support. It is so much better to ask for the help you need than to struggle on. It is a sign of strength, not a sign of failure to be able to acknowledge that this stuff is hard, the more we normalise asking for support the more others will feel able to do the same.
Create a routine: Creating a routine can help you feel more organised and in control. This doesn’t mean following a strict feeding/sleeping routine for your baby, but is more about creating a routine that YOU can follow. So waking up and getting a shower first thing might really help you, making a packed lunch the night before might work for you and getting outside for some sunlight and fresh air every day can be hugely beneficial to our mental health.
Break your routine! Being flexible is key to parenting. Things change, poonamis happen, teething means you spend all day cuddling on the sofa. Being flexible and able to break your routine is helpful, take the time you need and tomorrow is another day.
Don't compare yourself to others. I know, easy to say, not so easy to do. But every baby is different, and every parent has their own unique style. What works for one baby and family, might not work for yours. It's important not to compare yourself to other parents, as this can lead to unnecessary stress and anxiety. Trust yourself and your instincts, and remember that you are doing the best you can.
Take time to bond with your baby: Bonding with your baby is an important part of parenthood. It’s ok to slow down and really enjoy your baby. This doesn’t mean ‘enjoy every moment’ there will be many boring and rubbish moments. But try to find ways to spend quality time with your baby, such as cuddling, singing, dancing or reading to them. These special moments can help you build a strong connection and secure attachment with your child.
Be patient: Parenting is a learning process, and it's okay to make mistakes, infact it’s essential, how else do we learn? And what other job do you go into expecting to be perfect from day 1? Be patient with yourself and with your baby, and remember that you're both still getting to know each other.
Above all, remember that being a parent is a journey, and there will be ups and downs along the way. By taking care of yourself, asking for support, and being flexible, you can make this experience a positive one.
If you feel like you need to talk to someone about boosting your confidence or you’re suffering from postnatal anxiety, depression or birth trauma then please get in touch to talk about how solution focused hypnotherapy in Peterborough or online can support you to feel better.
Jo x